I’m guessing chicken eggs are as popular as they are mostly because chickens are easy to handle

There’s more to it. Chickens lay lots of eggs (like a dozen) before going broody (when they stop laying and just sit on the eggs to keep them warm), so production is high. Penguins OTOH, lay one of two per season.

I’m guessing chicken eggs are as popular as they are mostly because chickens are easy to handle

Except that they are. Chickens that are actually raised free, and peck on insects, herbs and other stuff outside lay eggs that are absolutely delicious, and the meat is also very tasty. You can even say that they come pre-seasoned, if you don’t mind chewy meat.

The almost tasteless eggs/meat come from industrial scale farming that feeds the chickens with grain-based feedstock in large amounts, so they grow quickly. (source: my aunts raised free-range chickens for both eggs and meat. They were really tasty)

Oh boy, the opening of the markets on Monday will be… entertaining to say the least.

The only stocks going up will be companies that sell popcorn.

Big Cheeto was afraid the penguins would flood American markets with cheap eggs, thus the tarifs.

This will trigger the world to move away from the Dollar as the currency for international trade, which will cause the collapse of the American financial sector.

I don’t see it happening anytime soon. To rejoin, they woukd have to accept all the new rules, one of them is adopting the Euro as currency. I’m not sure the English voters would be willing to abandon the Pound. Scottish, Welsh an Irish, maybe.

maybe even certainly healthier.

Fixed that for you. Anything is healthier than American “food”. Even British foods, possibly.